Bipolar

Long story short, I had a student in one of my classes get into trouble with me and the explanation they gave to administration for why they shouldn't get punished was:  "He's bipolar."  Ha!  I've never heard that excuse before, but at least it's creative...


That excuse got me thinking about some things, though.  It made me really reflect on my life, even consider whether I was actually bipolar or not.  And you know what I've concluded?


I am.


No, I don't mean in the clinical, "characteristic cycles of depression and elation" kind of way.   But I do think there are definitely two forces inside of me that battle on a daily basis.  There are two poles to which I feel pulled and it's a constant struggle for me to deal with them.  I read a passage like Romans 7:15-25 and I completely understand what Paul is going through:

"For I do not understand my own actions.  For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate.  Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good.  So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me.  For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh.  For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out.  For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing.  Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me.  So I find it to be a law that when I want to do right, evil lies close at hand.  For I delight in the law of God, in my inner being, but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members.  Wretched man that I am!  Who will deliver me from this body of death?  Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord!  So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind, but with my flesh I serve the law of sin."

I read that and I get the feeling that Paul literally sounds like a crazy person!  And then I think, "Me, too!"  Paul has perfectly captured in words the battle, the war that we all wage as believers.  I hope that you read a passage like that and you feel the same feeling resonating inside of you.  We struggle!  It's true.  Why not admit it?  Why not be honest about where we are in life instead of just pretending that everything's okay and telling everyone that we have it all together.  That's the furthest thing from the truth than anything I've heard in a long time.


Does that mean that we relish the fact that we're sinners?  That we just keep on sinning because, "I've already messed up this much.  What's one more sin?"  No, not by any means!  Paul even addresses that very issue in a previous chapter of Romans (6:1-4).  I do think, though, that we should be honest with people about sin in our lives and be the first to admit when we struggle with things.


I love what our pastor talked about in church this morning, too.  He talked about confession and how having good Christian accountability can do so much for a person.  That means admitting that you struggle with (insert sin here) and letting someone help you in that struggle.  That means holding other people accountable as well.  There's just no need to pretend anymore.  There's no point to playing this game that we all get caught up in, the game that says, "It's all those other people who are struggling with sin - I'm okay." or "My sin's not as bad as that guy's." or "No one will understand.  My sin is so much worse than everyone else."


Remember, Christ didn't come to save the people who have it all together.  He came to save the sinners.  He came to seek out the lost - and believe me, without Him we're all lost.


This whole world's full of crazy, bipolar people...and Jesus is the only one with the cure.