Peace

Long story short, for the past week or so as I've been reading the Bible I've been coming across verses that made me question my salvation a little. It made me unsettled because I still remember the day I gave my life to Christ like it was yesterday. To be honest, I really started questioning and wondering if God was trying to tell me that I only thought I had been a Christian all these years. Today, in Jeremiah 17 I read,

"The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick, who can understand it?"

That was a huge tipping point for me because I just really started worrying more than before. So I prayed. Halfway through my reading this morning I couldn't handle the worry anymore, so I just prayed:

"God, I know what you've done in my heart. I can see things that you've taught me through the years about yourself. I remember coming to you more clearly than anything. Please give me peace about my salvation, strength to keep pursuing your will, and the courage to do your will when I figure it out."

Feeling a little better and more at peace just from giving my worry to God, I continued in my reading. This was the first verse I read:

"I have said all these things to you to keep you from falling away." John 16:1

...and then this...

"...for the Father himself loves you, because you have loved me and have believed that I came from God." John 16:27

...and then this...

"I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace." John 16:33

If that's not an answer to prayer, I don't know what is! I feel like today was just for me, but I hope that it's an encouragement to some of you who read this.

Satisfaction

While I was reading this morning I found something that either I had overlooked or just never seen before, and yet again it was thought-provoking and convicting for me.

In John 14, Jesus is talking to the disciples about being the way, the truth and the life. Then, this is interjected:

"Philip said to him, 'Lord, show us the Father, and it is enough for us.'"

I think it's commonly interpreted as a misunderstanding. Obviously even Jesus thought that because of the way that he answers Philip's question. But I couldn't help thinking, "What if Philip didn't misunderstand? What if he got it better than any of the disciples?"

I mean, Philip has just been told that the only way to the Father is through Jesus and he has two responses:

1. He wants Jesus to lead him to the Father.

2. He is completely satisfied with that and nothing more.

How often do I ask just to be lead to the Father? To sit at His feet and glorify Him for who He is and what He's about? Often enough, I suppose. But I could certainly ask more. I could desire it more. Am I going to be satisfied with worship on Sunday and Wednesday? Or am I going to never let anything stop me from worshipping my Savior until God calls me home?

How often am I satisfied with just the Father and nothing more? Not nearly as often as I should. I don't think I could even count how many times I've asked God for stuff that I wanted or made deals with Him in tough situations. If God is as great and sustaining and incredible as I believe He is, why do I not settle for just being with Him?

Philip may have misunderstood Jesus at the time, but he sure did know how to ask a penetrating question.

Lord, show me to the Father, and it is enough for me.

Glory

John called me out this morning: "...for they loved the glory that comes from man more than the glory that comes from God." John 12:43

Here I was, boppin' along, almost to the end of my reading for the day, and I literally thought, "I don't feel very convicted about anything. Maybe God is giving me a break to focus on other lessons He's taught me." HA! My insides feel like He just body-slammed them all over the place.

I am painfully reminded today that all too often I seek the praise of man for the things that I do in life. I don't think that John is saying the praise of man is bad by any means. I mean one of the major ways that I encourage the people around me is by praising them for something they've said or done. I think even that praise is a very good thing. BUT, a dangerous thing happens when we trade normal praise for glory. When I lift someone or something up to a place of distinction, honor, even adoration - that's when I get in trouble. That's what John is talking about here. It's even worse in this example because John is refering to people who believe Jesus is the Christ and will not confess it because they value the glory of man more than the glory of God.

How many times in my life have I done that? I can't even say anymore because my heart is too heavy.

Timing

The thing about the Bible, to me, is that no matter what I happen to be reading for the day, it always seems to convict me about something. Now, I don't really know if I like that or not! I mean, on the one hand it means that the Bible is relevant to life and I am definitely okay with that. But on the other hand it implies that I have a lot of junk in my life that needs convicting about, and to be honest I don't like admitting that I'm sinful and have things that need fixing! Wouldn't it just be easier if God could let me be and not keep forming me into His image?

Anyway, here is yet another example of the conviction of the Word in my own life:

"Jesus said to them, 'My time has not yet come, but your time is always here.'" John 7:6

When I first read that verse this morning, I thought, 'Oh, yeah, Jesus is talking about how His time on the cross has not yet come, He's just biding His time until the final act when He saves us all from our sins.' But something struck me and I had to read it again.

I think it was the word 'always' that did it. Here I am reading a verse and passing all the responsibility of glorifying God through sacrifice onto Jesus, when the whole key to this verse rests on me and my calling. Jesus said, '...your time is ALWAYS HERE.' I feel like maybe an exclamation point needs to go there because He is emphasizing my responsibility as a Christian.

What am I here on earth for? "To glorify God and enjoy Him forever." I'm not here to just be laissez-faire and say that someone else can share Christ with the people of this world. I'm not hear to just have "fire-insurance." I am here on earth to give my whole life in sacrifice to God. I am here to give up my wants for His wants, my desires for His desires. I am here to share Christ with every person that I meet without regard for consequence, reputation, or anything!

And what do I do instead? I sit, stand, walk, and talk through life while letting opportunity after opportunity pass me by to share the love of Christ. I push my responsibility off onto other people, but go to church regularly and worship so that I can feel good about myself.

Like Penn Jillette (an atheist) so convictingly said in a recent video, "How much do you have to hate somebody to not proselytize? How much do you have to hate somebody to believe that everlasting life is possible, and NOT tell them that?"

Arise

This passage has been stuck in my head for almost a week now. I think mainly it's because the verses are utterly convicting and totally encouraging at the same time. Maybe I should share them with someone?

"Arise, shine, for your light has come, and the glory of the Lord has risen upon you. For behold, darkness shall cover the earth, and thick darkness the peoples; but the Lord will arise upon you and his glory will be seen upon you. And nations shall come to your light, and kings to the brightness of your rising." Isaiah 60:1-3

How encouraging is it to know that the Lord is shining so brightly for us to see in this pit we live in for the time being? He loves us and He's bringing us out of the darkness!

But, I have been seriously convicted as well. The first two words seem like commands to me. They just punch and poke and prod at me.

Arise!

Shine!

Am I? My prayer is that every day I rise up and shine the glory of the Lord that has risen upon me. I suppose having to ask myself that question means I haven't been doing a very good job. May I continue in conviction until His kingdom comes.